Saturday, April 16, 2011

Who am I?

So tonight I'm sitting here, both princesses are in bed and hubby is away working. A lot of time for contemplation for me. I've realised a couple of things in the last few 'single parent' days.

Since I got married and had children, I've unintentionally (of course) sacrificed a few of the things I really used to love doing before I met my husband. I'm not talking about the usual single life stuff, I mean the personal, who I am things. I think the first thing I 'lost' was writing. Poems and stories. I have a book somewhere filled with poetry that I have written, and I'm sure somewhere on my old desktop pc there is a folder of word docs that are my creative attempts at, well, creative writing!

Another thing is music, I LOVE music! But I just never get to listen to it anymore. Not MY music anyway, Gary Allan, Lady Antebellum, Tim McGraw, just to name a few. I Love country music!

There was nothing that could beat cleaning the house with the stereo blaring the latest favourite, or driving in the car with the tunes cranked! Ah, these days I'm lucky to have iTunes open on the laptop to listen to a couple of favourites while I'm washing up. And in the car I'm not lucky at all. It's Justine Clarke, or nothing mum! Until she goes to sleep, and then it's usually too late anyway!

It's not all bad though, this mummy life has given me a few new hobby loves that I probably wouldn't have if I didn't have kids. Like sewing! Once I get an idea, pattern or tutorial in my head there's no stopping me! I'll be up till the am finishing this or that. Like my latest work-in-progress:

I started out with a plan to make a liner for Jessica's capsule (BabyLove Snap'n'Go) but when I saw these gorgeous prints I had to push myself that little bit further! Although I am at a stand still at the moment, I need more fabric, and I haven't quite worked out how I'm going to finish the back and get around the stabilising bar.

I guess I just have to get used to the few moments I get to listen to a song quietly (like now) while my princesses sleep. In the end I guess none of that stuff really matters. I am still who I was back then, I've just evolved. I have a wonderful family and I love being a mum, and nothing can ever change that.


Tab said...

"I am still who I was back then, I've just evolved. "

I LOVE IT!! Also that liner looks great :) Hopefully you solve your stabiliser bar challenge in your dreams.

Belinda said...

haha thanks Tab, some dream that'll be!

Tab said...

I do have dreams like that. When I was at school, I did math in my sleep. I think my brain has shonky wiring!

Vicky said...

I totally agree. There are so many things that get tossed aside when motherhood starts. I also miss cranking the stereo to my favourite tunes. Now all I listen to is Nursery Rhymes.

Belinda said...

Yep Vicky, I started iTunes tonight and was humming along for a minute before I realised I was listening to Rockabye Baby! Lullaby Renditions of Journey. HAHAHA

Amy said...

I know where you are coming from. I had the same kind of who am I thoughs last month.

On the music front I have been re-adjusting my kids taste in music. My son is known to start signing some of my fav songs, some say I have trained him well, PMSL.

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